Navigating the Holidays

When you meet the partner of your dreams you think of many things one of which may or may not be how you are going to split the holidays. Each family has their own dynamics, traditions, and complications, when you become a couple it is your job to navigate, handle and enjoy the holidays with both families.  Navigating the Holidays

How do you and your spouse navigate the holidays? Do split them up or do you have both families close enough to see both on each? 

The Naturalist Mom – Fortunately this is easy for us because my husband’s family lives out of state. Usually we travel ten minutes up the road to my parents for festivities. However, we have decided that we are going to start making our own traditions. Traveling out of state through the holidays is almost impossible because of school and my husband’s job. We want to start making our own memories and those might include just picking up and going on a mini vacation for those days, whether that means we just act like hermits and stay home (together) or travel a few hours and experience a new town for several days. Holidays are supposed to be relaxing and enjoyable while spending quality time together. So much of the holiday season is pure chaos and we’ve decided that it might become tradition to just do something different in the future.

The Hot Mess Mom – When we only had my daughter we would usually go to my in laws for dinner and my mom would come also. My husband’s parents are only 20 min away and the same with my mom. Since we had our son in 2012 the holidays have been spent at our house. We are lucky enough to have both sides be close enough and they are understanding of the difficulties in traveling with kids but that also means that every thanksgiving and Christmas I cook for about 10-12 people. I don’t mind though, I like knowing that if my kids need a nap or it’s time for bed then they can just go lay down in the comfort of their own room. The holidays can be stressful when it’s all on my shoulders but it could definitely be worse if we had to worry about 4 plane tickets or 6 hour long car rides or the kids having to stay in unfamiliar places. For now I’ll stick with being the hostess 🙂

The Perfectionist Mom – We have a lot of houses to shuffle in between. When we were dating we tried a bunch of different options. None of them seemed to work and when we got married we knew something had to adjust. In the end we decided to make a spreadsheet. It tells everyone for the next however many years, where we are going to be for certain holidays. We rotate so every year we are without one family. We go out of our way on those years to give that family an extra visit so we don’t go too long without seeing them. This saves not only hurt feelings but also saves our sanity. It is wonderful being able to say exactly where we are going to be for holidays three years down the road. My mom is only 30 minutes away so we get at least one holiday at our own home two out of the three years, which is nice. I get to practice my hosting skills, which I love and we will be able to start some traditions with our daughter, which is so important to us.

The Not-So-Single Mom – As you may have seen, my husband isn’t always home for the holidays. When he isn’t home, I try to go to my parent’s house, but both our families live far away, so it’s not always possible. I’ve spent many alone. If he is home, we actually like to spend the holidays together as our own new family. If any of our family members traveled for the holidays, they’re welcome to come after we have spent our alone time together. It’s rare that we travel, since he travels so much for work, because he just isn’t in the mood for travel once he’s home. I’ve never been one that likes to travel for holidays, since growing up we mostly stayed home as a family for big holidays like Christmas. I want my daughter to experience that as well, and then traveling after the holiday to see family…that is unless my husband isn’t home…then I will travel to avoid being alone if at all possible!

How do you and your spouse navigate the holidays? Do split them up or do you have both families close enough to see both on each? 

Best,

Your MOMentous Moms

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Welcome to MOMentous Motherhood. My name is Kristin and we are a mommy blog like no other. We love to share our crazy stories about becoming moms and building a home and family. From the moment you find out you are pregnant to the time they head off on their own parenting is a group sport. It takes a village and we are here for you!

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